complex desires
by medeamazon
Summary: Their first night as husband and wife was not as smooth as he thought it would be. But it was more meaningful than he ever expected.


**disclaimer: if Naruto was mine, I would have drawn this scene in details**

 **complex desires**

Sakura was bursting with happiness.

A bubbly feeling, one she probably had not felt since she was a child, was simmering inside her ribcage, making it a bit difficult to breath.

Sakura Uchiha. She was Sasuke's wife.

She had always imagined this moment a little different. The ceremony in a sanctuary in the middle of the forest, with a little pond nearby, and only the officiator and the family of the inn nearby as witnesses: who could have thought that this would have made her so blissfully happy?

She felt Sasuke squeezing gently the hand ensconced in his, and saw the shadow of a smile under the long black bangs.

She squeezed it back and leaned on his arm, too content to ask if she was annoying him.

They were walking back to the inn, the only guests of this little gem between the mountains of Stone. The hosts had arrived before them, and they had prepared already the little apartment near the central building, which had a separate entrance and looked "like a newlywed's house", as the woman had tittered when she understood their plans.

Sasuke opened the door and switched on the lights.

The bubbly feeling had subsided, and she entered the house with calmness, thinking about her future life.

* * *

Sasuke sat on the sofa and exhaled happily, leaning into the back of the couch. He heard Sakura putting the water for tea on. Then, he suddenly felt the little hands of his wife on his shoulders, massaging softly.

He closed his eyes.

When the teapot was ready, Sakura prepared everything and brought it to the coffee table in front of the couch. He understood that she wanted to be the most traditional wife she could be, in this untraditional situation. Setting on the floor in front of each other, husband and wife drank the tea in silence, enjoying the moment and thinking how incredible it was that they arrived at this point.

Sasuke watched his wife. A new shyness was showing in the blush of her cheeks, and he recognised the reason. The first night as married people was starting.

Sasuke got up from the floor and tended a hand towards his wife. She looked first to the floor, then with determination she took the hand and stood up.

When they arrived into their room Sakura was again watching the floor. She murmured: "I need to go to the bathroom" and fled to the en-suite.

A bit perplexed, Sasuke sat on an armchair in the corner of the room, looking at the moon outside the window.

When he heard the door clicking, he turned to see his wife, who was donning a red and cream kimono much simpler than the sophisticated one of the ceremony, very modest and knee-length.

Sasuke thought that she must have been nervous, and she didn't want to be unnecessarily embarrassed with any risqué outfit. It's not like for him there was any difference.

He watched her strolling slowly towards him and, au contraire, tending a hand to make him stand up. He complied, so that he was watching her from above, the height difference highlighted because they were only few centimeters apart.

She was watching his chest, covered by his kimono, and with a bit of nervousness he saw her hands taking the ends of the obi and tugging one to loosen it. She finally looked into his eyes, to gauge his reaction.

When she saw him looking at her intensely, completely focused on her, she took her eyes back to the task at hand. She took the folds of his kimono and tugged him so that they were walking towards the futon. He followed her willingly.

Once there, she continued to give him orders with only gestures, and slowly, as if to test if it was okay with him, she undressed him of his kimono, leaving him in his boxers. With a gesture of impatience, he took her elbow to bring her body on his, but her hand stopped him, caressing his forearm and looking at him again, this time shaking slowly her head with clear, determined eyes.

She sat on the floor with their arms and their eyes still linked, compelling him to do the same.

When he his knees were touching hers on the floor, she put her hand around his neck and kissed him with sweetness. Sasuke deepened the kiss, for the first time pressing his lips strongly against hers and brought her to him with his arm around her waist.

He inhaled greedily her scent, he felt her soft body and thought that it was a beautiful feeling, probably the most pleasant he had ever experienced.

Keeping his mouth on hers, trying to deepen even more the kiss, he felt her hands pressing on his shoulder, her mouth separating from his.

Confused, he watched her to understand what she wanted. One hand was laying on his chest, beckoning him to sit on the futon. Again, he followed her muted orders, trying to understand her intentions.

Her mouth returned to his body, but this time on his neck, kissing and nibbling. If he thought the kiss was pleasant, these ministrations were incredible, and he leaned on his elbow, letting his head fall backwards and exhaling loudly. She looked at him from her position over his body and smiled at him. He tried to sit back to start kissing her like that, but she kept his body in his position with her hand. It wasn't exactly easy to fight her strength.

She kept on kissing his skin with devoted touches of her lips, and he relaxed again, letting her show her feelings and drowning willingly, as he never let himself do, in the love she was giving him.

When he felt her soft lips on his abs, though, he snapped his head back, and he saw that his wife was already watching, waiting for his reaction. He was breathing more heavily than normal, and his breath stopped at all when she continued her trail southward, confirming what he suspected.

He decided to lift the comfortable silence that had followed them until now, because he couldn't stop her with a hand: "Sakura, you don't have to…"

"Shhh..." was the eloquent answer of his surprising bride. He didn't think they would have done this for the first night. He wanted her to have all the control she wanted, but he was surprised that she intended to do this as their first sexual act.

Sakura was already kissing the skin right before his boxers, she hooked her fingers on them and watched him again. She asked for permission with a tilt of her head, and he nodded once, feeling his heart hammering and his excitement skyrocketing.

She divested him swiftly of his boxers (he briefly realized that she was still totally dressed).

She watched curiously his erection, and her eyes darkened. It was a sight so erotic that Sasuke had to look away for a moment.

A heartbeat after though, he was forced to turn his attention back on his surprisingly seductress of a wife, because he felt her hand wrapping against his shaft and tugging it experimentally.

Her eyes searched for his again, trying to understand how it felt for him, and she must have found the right answer because she did it again, making him bite his lips for the pleasure he had never know could be so intense. And it was just the beginning.

Setting a rhythm with her hand, Sakura stayed above him to miss no reaction of his. And he felt her smugness when he gave up and rolled his head backwards, feeling his pleasure mounting.

When he closed his eyes though, he felt something wet on his appendage, and his elbow almost gave out.

He snapped his eyes open again, in time to see his virgin, innocent wife lowering her mouth on his length, maddeningly slow. He almost came in the moment.

When he felt himself hitting her throat, his elbow really gave out, and he emitted a moan as he had never in all his life.

The sensation of her mouth working on him, in and out, in and out, was making him embarrassingly close to the limit, making him pant and clench his jaws to hold himself.

When he felt he couldn't last anymore, he put his hand on her shoulder, trying to stop her and make all of this finish before time. But the only result he had was her eyes on him while she was lowering her lips, and a quickening on the rhythm. It made him agitated, and trying to control himself he pleaded: "Sakura, no, I'm really coming, I can't…"

But again, all his protests had the only effect of making her more determined and she started to swirl her tongue around him, sucking even stronger.

It was too much, and Sasuke exploded in her mouth, a pleasure more intense he had ever felt, which managed for some minutes to wash away his guilt for not lasting enough.

When he managed to form a coherent thought again, he saw that his wife was laying on her side near him, watching him with tenderness and satisfaction. She took his hand and interlaced their fingers, then she dropped her head on the pillow and closed her eyes.

Perplexed, Sasuke disentangled his fingers from hers and put his hand on her waist, tugging her kimono to start doing the same on her. He was sure that giving her the same attentions would make his erection come back in few seconds.

But when she opened her eyes, she only gave a quick smile, took his hand from her waist and brought them again in the part of the futon between them. She closed her eyes again.

He didn't understand. He sit up and tried to caress her neck but she stopped him again, and he was starting to get annoyed.

Shaking her a bit, he ordered "Sakura, get up."

Sighing and opening again her eyes (as if she really wanted to go to sleep, now!), she sat up in front of him, eyeing him cautiously. Why this expression? Was she afraid of what he would do? Did she think he would press her to do something she didn't want? He just wanted his turn to please her, as was normal!

"What is it, Sasuke-kun?"  
"What is it? Sakura, can you explain why can't I touch you?"

"Of course you can touch me, Sasuke-kun, you're my husband."

"Then why do you shake off my hand? Sakura." He called her name to make her take the situation seriously.

"It's just… you don't have to do it back just because I did it."

"What?"

She was still watching down, and she was still not making any sense.

"Sakura… what is the problem? I thought you wanted to… to have a complete first night as husband and wife. But if you don't want, if you don't feel ready, it's okay, I can wait, you know I can".

"Yes, I know you can."

"What is that supposed to mean?". He was getting angry, and he turned to be positioned completely in front of her. She did the same, sitting demurely on her feet, with her knees towards him.

"Nothing, Sasuke-kun, there's nothing wrong. I just don't feel comfortable right now to do such things."  
"Are you hearing yourself? You have just done something I didn't think you even knew existed, you were comfortable then!"

"It's just… I told you Sas'ke, there's not a law that you have do it back."

"Of course not, I want to do it back!"

She looked at him then, really looked, and he realized that she didn't believe him at all.

His voice softened, and he sat like her, the blankets hiding his nether regions. He took her hand and her eyes followed its movement.

"Sakura. What is it? Why do you think I don't want to reciprocate? Did you really think that I would just take my pleasure and fall asleep?"

This made her look at him again, agitated.

"No! I'm sorry, I didn't want to hurt you or make you feel bad in anyway! It's just… "

"What? Tell me, Sakura. You're my wife."

She was silent, and she slowly put her hand on her chest, clutching her kimono. Sasuke waited.

"I don't think you actually desire me." She whispered, ashamed.

Sasuke felt his heart constricting.

"What?" he croaked, swallowing air.

"You don't think I desire you? Why… why do you think I married you? To be friends?"  
Her hand were wrangling each other now.

"You did. You think… Sakura, look at me! Why do you think I married you? Answer!" He took her wrist to make her react, and she retracted as if she was scolded.

"I don't know! I don't know if you desire me because you never even hinted that I was acceptable for you in that way!"

"I asked you to marry me." He was cold now, he couldn't believe his ears. At the top of his happiness, an enormous obstacle he never saw coming, or even existing, was threatening already his newly formed family. He knew that nothing could be that simple. Now he was the one glaring at the floor.

"Sasuke… I know, I know that you care about me, and trust me, for me it's enough. I know the meaning of your gesture at the gate before your journey, I know that I am a precious teammate and friend for you, that you don't want to lose me... Believe me, I know, and it makes me unmeasurably happy."

Sasuke was watching her now, listening carefully.

"I followed you on this journey, and I would never have thought that you'd ask me to marry you after not even two months. And it made me happy, Sasuke, so, so happy. I don't think you can understand how much. I am sorry for tonight, because I thought I could go until the end, I could make love to you ignoring my doubts, but I didn't… I couldn't stand to see you watching me with mild interest when I desired you so much for so long! I thought I could, I thought I could endure it until I would make you really desire me, but I couldn't, and I am sorry."

There were tears now in her eyes, not yet spilled, and Sasuke hated himself once again.

He took her chin gently, bringing his face near hers.

Her eyes were a glimmering seafoam of love and sadness.

Why he couldn't do anything right?

He thought she had understood his feelings when he had asked for her hand. She was so happy, and they had looked at each other with what he thought was a complete, perfect, reciprocal love.

But it wasn't. She had always been in tune with his feelings and his thoughts, but how could he ask of her to understand his desire for her too?

She understood his need for a family, his platonic love for her, but how could she understand he loved her in every way now, romantically, physically, emotionally, if he didn't say or do anything?

No, these feeling had to be said, especially after the two brutal rejections he had subjected her in a few years. Of course, she thought he was indifferent to her person, having cast her away twice with nary a thought.  
He sighed, angry with himself but determined to make her see what he thought.

He cupped her jaw, stroking her cheek tenderly with his thumb.

"I do desire you, Sakura. I would not have married you if I only thought of you as a teammate or friend. I… I don't know how to show it except now, with the hand you're shrugging off."

He tried to kiss her, to make her understand with his body, but she stopped him again.

Her tears had spilled and she breathed shakily.

"I think… I also thought you wanted to marry me to make me happy, and because you didn't know anyone else that you could entirely love."

Every word was a stab in the chest for Sasuke, but he was glad she wasn't hiding anything from him. They had to go to the bottom of the problem to solve it.

"I could never do that to you. Sakura" he raised her head again "I want you, and no one else. I ask you this as your husband. Let me show you. Trust me for a bit. Please."

She looked at his serious expression and she nodded, once.

Feeling relieved, Sasuke didn't waste time in uniting their lips again, this time taking the initiative, trying to pour all his desire for her in his actions.

He didn't hesitate in prodding her entrance with his tongue, and sliding it in her cavern when she gasped. He got rid of every caution, even the ones he had had only thinking about her comfort and expectations.

He started to move his hand on her neck, then lower between the folds of her kimono. He tugged forcefully on the obi to make it open, and when she tried on impulse to close it again, he clutched the fabric on her back to finally undress her.

He didn't give her time to gasp, kissing her again, and sneaking his hand around her tiny waist, thrusting her flushing body against his, her hand on his chest, and finally her breast too.

Because whatever she thought, he actually desired her a lot.

Since his newly acknowledged hormones had begun to visit his dreams, there was only a body, only one face he had ever envisioned. Before she came to him, he even had some day fantasies of her, imagining how she looked now, how she was under her clothes, and every time he immediately reprimanded himself for his shameless, disrespectful thoughts.

If only she knew. When they met again he was afraid that she'd think he was taking advantage of her feelings for him, and he had dragged his eyes away when they automatically settled on her legs, an embarrassing number of times per day. He was shocked she had never caught him.

He had decided that it was ridiculous to keep on pining for each other when they were evidently ready to stay together: he had taken the bull by the horns and asked her to marry him.

Making a mess, of course.

But now that he knew the problem, he knew how to behave in this new mission. He had to do the opposite of what he had done, letting himself be the pervert he had discovered to be.

He started licking and nibbling her neck, biting and sucking; he heard with satisfaction her tiny whimpers and decided he wanted more.

Circling her wrists with his hand, he brought them up, ignoring her furious blush. He started trailing lower with his mouth and finally, he arrived where a lot of his fantasies where set on.

He started kissing in circle around her nipple, and when she sighed he took one in his mouth, sucking gently. The moan he was awarded with was the best sound he had ever heard.

He removed himself begrudgingly, the taste of her soft skin was something he would never wish be parted with, ever.

He lowered her arms, watched her skin red with desire and embarrassment. He put his hand under her breasts and gently pushed her towards the bed, relief in founding no resistance.

He stopped for a moment, looking at the body he had only imagined for so long.

She was perfect. He let his eyes linger on her whole form, baring all his thoughts to her, trying not to think about anything but her beauty. She was the only woman he had ever desired and fuck, if he was lucky to have someone like her as wife. Her beautiful lineaments, her soft lips, her taut stomach, her full breast with pink, stiff nipples, everything was making him pant with a desire he never thought he could feel, and he couldn't believe his luck in having all of this at his disposal.

He looked at her eyes and saw how surprised she was of his gaze, how her desire was also taking control over her.

When he bent down to kiss her again, she met him halfway, and finally the most passionate kiss bloomed like an unstoppable need between them.

They parted, breathless, and Sasuke continued from where he took off, licking and kissing with devotion from her breast to under her navel.

She was now so full of need now that she let Sasuke take off her panties with ease.

He was starting to kiss her thighs towards a predictable target, his arm hooked under one of them and the hand on her stomach to keep her down, when she tugged on his hair.

He stopped to glare at her, ready to do what he wished and with no intention to stop even at her requests.

She looked at him with his same desire instead, biting her lips.

"Please, I promise, it's not the same as before but…please, I can't wait anymore Sas'ke, I can't..."

She didn't know how to tell him without embarrassing herself that she needed desperately to have him inside.

He seemed to understand, because he got up from his position, crawling back slowly, and positioning himself to stay over her.

When he was finally srt between her legs, she bit her lip with need, but he didn't move. She looked up, and saw his gaze. She was breathless. His eyes were looking at her with desire and tenderness, but the moved expression of his face showed her how much this meant for him.

it was heart-breaking and wonderful, and she promised herself to never underestimate his feelings for her. His eyes told her that in this moment she was the most important thing in the world for him, his family and his new centre.

She stroked his cheek softly and closing his eyes, he lowered himself towards her, kissing her slowly and softly, stroking his tongue with hers in a tender, erotic dance.

She felt right then his erection against her soaked folds, and pushed her hips to encouraged.

Slowly, tentatively, he started to fill her, to sink into her, keeping their lips touching softly.

The stretching feeling was only a bit uncomfortable, but when he was finally buried in her she couldn't help the few tears of happiness that had escaped from her eyes. He took her hand in his then, interweaving their fingers, and he started to move, careful and hesitant.

When he realized that she was comfortable with him inside, he started to slide quicker in and out of her. Their bodies were pushed against each other, nothing between them and she thought she could never feel so much again. Her emotions were heightened by her pleasure, and she had never felt more alive, more linked to the present.

When he decided to go harder and faster, she couldn't hold it anymore. Her orgasm run through all her body, her brain exploded with the pleasure. When she came from her high, she was thankful he was coming in that moment: his face was showing everything he was feeling, his features blissful while he was spilling into her, with his mouth open and eyes closed in ecstasy.

When he collapsed on her, trying not to crash her with his weight, she kept him there, hugging him against her body, trying to feel him like this forever, rejoicing in the feeling of his face against her neck.

He slowly got off of her, but he kept their fingers joined.

Looking at her, he wondered if he had succeeded in his mission. From the little smile on her face and the fact that she set herself to sleep naked in his arms… he was pretty sure he had.

* * *

Should I continue with the morning after? Are they very OOC? Reviews are very much appreciated, above all the ones with constructive criticism! If the language seems off, english it's not my first language and I am always looking to improve!


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